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They said we lost the last marble.
They said we were one cookie short of WeightWatchers.
They were right.
But so were we!
Nobody believed that the most charming Master Figwit could inspire our readers to write poetry. But nothing is impossible for Figwit, the Decipher Elf! So here it is - a selection of the many "Figgie" poems we got as contributions for the contest. Our warmest thanks go out to all who have participated!
Let's start with the winner (of a Figwit-deciphercard, signed by Bret McKenzie):
~°~
THE YOUNG ADVISOR AT THE COUNCIL
by Elbereth
I fancy you are still untouched
By love or fancies wild
And somehow in your eyes I see
In heart, you are a child
Adults body, clad in robes
Severe on slender frame
Face so grave and serious
And ever so the same
Intelligence is in your gaze
Oh, that is plain to see
The makings there of one who might
Take flight and find the sea
Scribe, advisor, working life
You ever onwards taking
And what trial and strife in life
Has been your courage making?
Away to Havens, grey and dim
And dawn of silver glass
You’ll remain my Melpomaen
However time may pass
~°~
Honorable mentions and T-shirts went to the creator of the following poem:
FIGWIT'S TITLE
by Kirkinski the Elf Worshipper
He's not the Prince of Mirkwood,
He's got the wrong colour hair,
If he were human and rugged and rough,
He could have been Isildur's heir.
He's not the Lord of Rivendell,
Though he could be related to him,
He could never be the Ringbearer
He's much too tall and trim.
He's not the steward of Gondor,
Or the Lady of the Golden Wood,
He's not the King of Rohan,
Though all of those titles are good.
But Figwit's title is greatest of all,
And of that I have no doubt,
Though he may not be the Lord of the Rings,
He's the Prince of the Puppydog Pout.
~°~
We got over 40 Figwit-poems - here are some more:
FIGWIT
by Princess Brunette
Fair arth thee
Hair of brown
This wondrous prince
Needs not a crown
His voice is soft
Tender, indeed
He forgets not
His courtly deed
He leaves for the havens, lo!
I will never forget thee
I will never forget the kindness
He showed me
I, Arwen, Queen of Gondor
Commemorate this elf
For he always stayed true
to himself
~°~
FIGWIT
by Ilona
Of old there was an elven elf
who was a wondrous fair.
of pearly white his tonails were
and glossy was his hair.
one day while walking through the wooods
he spied an elven maid
a-crying on a fallen log
and wearing svelty suede
"o maiden fair" cried figwit dear
"what ail thy troubled brow?"
"I have applied" the maid replied
"the wrong type of designer, custom, nutrient rich shampoo for my delicate yet frizzy hair condition"
But clever figwit had a plan
and brewed a magic broth
to fix the maidens damaged hair
and make it shine and gloss
the final element he did add
the maiden held her breath
and POOF
he turned into a pumpkin
~°~
MELPOMAEN
by Elbereth
There was a young elf Melpomaen
Who stubbornly walked in the rain
His nose, it turned red
And his mother with dread
Said she feared that it would so remain
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